The beauty in "being human"

“Being Human” to me means a person showing what I would, in the past, have called having issues…or something similar pointing to negativity.  I now am beginning to see those moments as authentic and can see the beauty in a person allowing me to be present to see it; and allowing themselves to just be.  By default I am also seeing the beauty in myself being authentic in those moments, versus beating myself up.  I’m learning to notice and let go.  I’m beginning to transcend and truly show up for myself and  in my relationships in a more powerful way.  Wow!  What a journey these last few months have been!  Moving a business and opening a second location, becoming a certified Parelli Professional (woohoo!), and participating in the culturesync courses Tribal Leadership Intensive 1 and 2.  All these experiences have created a flow of opportunity for major growth that I never saw coming.  Stepping into my fears with the major changes in my business and giving myself permission to have fears about living my dreams with horses and with Parelli, but go there anyway, while continuing my horsemanship journey have brought me to this place of real self acceptance.   You see, I have been given tools and accountability that have led me to focus on human relationships more than I had been in a long time.  I’ve come to see that living a meaningful life starts with real connections.  Not networking…CONNECTIONS.  Before I can ask a person to get involved in a project or do something with or for me, I really need to CONNECT to have anything of beauty come of it.  Simultaneously, we have to find some resonance of values and a noble cause.  In the Tribal Leadership Intensive Courses, we have been working at listening for values in conversations with others.  This has given me more of an awareness on how much I have not been truly connecting with people in my life.  I had consistently been focused on me in conversations and relationships…what are my interests, what am I excited about, what do I want from this interaction, what do I want to say next?  OMG!  How self absorbed.  For a while, I’d been thinking I had a self worth problem.  I now am asking the question, “does lack of self worth sometimes mean too much self absorption?”.  If we are feeling less than, or seeing the world in a way that we begin to feel less than, are we being a bit self absorbed?  On the flip side, if we’re focused on supporting others in our lives and looking for opportunities to increase their success or happiness, it seems almost impossible to feel lack of self worth.  Couple that with creating and keeping relationships based on resonant values and a noble cause, then include a project..add to that the stability of triadic relationships and Katy bar the door!  TLI 1 and 2 teachings also include creating relationships based on merit, which is helping me to see that some relationships don’t make sense.  This allows me to move on and not judge them, or me, but to be clear that the relationship doesn’t make sense.  How powerful.  This time in my life and these glorious opportunities are truly helping me transition into a much more powerful place.  I knew there was something missing in me and it is beginning to show up and be filled up:-)  I now keep this formula in my mind as I connect with other humans…Connection & Support, WE v/s me + values & project + filling roles ONLY with people whose heart sings in that role = Having an ongoing CONVERSATION that generates authentic, genuine success for ALL.

I’ve come to this conclusion.  Life is way more than a journey.  It’s a CONVERSATION full of inquiry.  And a real gift that has come of all this human connecting is that I am truly putting the connection with my horse first and not moving forward to “do” anything if the expression isn’t there.  I’m getting more clear on the concept of having loyalty to our horse.  The CONNECTION is everything.  What does my horse need in every moment?  That’s the question I now ask.  And I can finally focus on that without letting the worry of possible judgement from others cloud the CONVERSATION or take too much of my time.  I’m not saying it’s not coming up at all…I am, after all, simply human.  However, I now notice it and let it go.  

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